I broke my silence by telling a friend. I was sexually abused by my paternal grandfather from the age of 7 until age 13 (what I can remember). It was initially all a game of which I did not understand the concept, of what was happening to me, when I got older I would say no but it happened anyway until the day before my 13th birthday. I was in a car journey from my mother’s house to my fathers (1hr 30m) we had pulled over to let the dog out when he tried it, he was a smoker so I grabbed a lighter and threatened his life. Before this time I'd only said no never really stood up for myself properly and that was it, it stopped. I still had to see him many times but he never tried anything, would just be nice to me which made me feel sick. I did nothing for years I was too ashamed, too scared not only that people wouldn't believe me but of letting the cat out of the bag after suppressing the memories, thinking that I did something to provoke it, that something was wrong with me. Eventually I did it and I went to the police I told them everything that had happened, 2 crown court cases down the line and he was sentenced to 52 years imprisonment (serving 10 no bail due to age). I now know that I have nothing to be ashamed of, I should never have been scared and that I did nothing, I was a victim of a horrific crime that only a sick minded person could commit. Yes I will live with what happened to me for the rest of my life, but it does not define who I am and it will not dictate what I am in the future. To anyone who has suffered, is still suffering or is yet to suffer, you are strong, you are beautiful, and you are worthy. You define who you are!