I had been friends with this guy for approximately 7 years, we were incredibly good friends and super close although I made it very apparent that I never wanted anything more and he seemed cool with that. For seven whole years he was cool with that. He stood by me after I got abused by my ex and listened to me tell him about how in moments like that I just freeze and panic; the very next day he abused the trust I had put into him entirely. He was having a rough time at home so trying to be a good friend I said "Hey look why don't we go to the seaside for a couple days to clear your head?" "Sure that sounds like a good idea, thanks" he replied. Everything was all good until it got quite late and I was rolled over watching TV, antiques roadshow to be exact at 11pm; when he forced his hand into my trousers and underwear and proceeded to try and finger me. I froze for around 2 minutes probably not knowing what to do at all then my head said "if you roll facing him then his hand has to come out" so that's what I did. Upon doing that he began to kiss and grope me, I didn't kiss back, I nervously laughed and pushed him off several times but he continued to do it. It then got to the point where I would ask him to stop each time; "Okay no stop now" I'd say but it literally felt like I was invisible. He was paying no attention whatsoever, after 6 times of asking him to stop I snapped and said "Seriously if you don't stop I'll punch you in the fucking face" only then did he stop. I had to spend a further 24 hours 60 miles away from home with him with no other route home and it was a complete nightmare, I acted normal because I didn't know what else to do. A year later and it still affects me and I have been diagnosed with complex post-traumatic stress disorder from that event and various others that had happened previously. I can still remember what underwear I was wearing, I can still remember how he tasted and how sore it felt, I can still remember the exact layout of the room and what I had for dinner that evening and that we went to the shops afterwards to get snacks as he rubbed my back the entire way around the shop. Just because I didn't say no the first time that does not mean he had any rights to do what he did. It is so important people come to realize this.

K. Bunting