As a teen I was groomed, I was 14 he was 29. To me the age was no big deal and at the time I loved him more than anyone, he made me feel loved and feel like I needed him. It was all sweet and innocent at the start, we spoke for hours on the phone every day until he started getting possessive over me. Demanded to know who I was with, where I was, proof that I was where I was, he even had somebody follow me home from school and everywhere I went. But I did love him, I traveled 70 miles to be with him, the first night I actually met him he was arrested for my abduction and grooming offenses. I didn’t believe he’d groomed me, he loved me so I went back to see him whilst he was on bail. This time he was different, he wanted to kill me, told me he could just hit me over the head then throw me in the canal, I ran and he chased me. Eventually he was arrested that night and remanded into custody. I thought that was the end, I loved him but he was toxic to me. He went to prison but one of his friends took over from him, had me so in love with him like he was my Prince Charming building I back together after what had happened, turns out he was just the same using me for sex, paying me to sleep with him. I felt dirty and used, I’d get drunk too forget everything. I was only 15 then and hated myself, I self-harmed and he loved it, made me do it more to please him. I got pregnant not long after I turned 17 and he left, both of the men I had ever loved had hurt me, used me and abused me. My baby saved me from it all, I moved town, and I dropped contact with friends, family because I had to protect my child. Having a baby isn’t everybody’s way out of being abused but it was certainly mine. There’s a light at the end where everybody’s tunnel.

Anonymous

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