I was a silly freshman girl chasing after a handsome senior boy, the first time we dated. Two weeks later we broke up because he texted himself pretending to be his mom to get out of hanging out with me. I should have seen he was no good from that day but not getting what I wanted, made me feel like I needed him.

A year and a half later, he moves back from college and we hit it off right away as friends. Next thing I know I am hanging out with him every day and he became my best friend. Six months after that, we dated. I should have known, the first red flag was when he told me he loved me before we were even dating. About a year goes by of dating, I see my friends and family less and less, it’s more and more him. Eventually, everything I do is centered on him, like he's my only source of reason. The first time I saw the monster in him come out was when I talked about breaking up with him because he failed to ever have a papered job.

This was extremely important because I had found out I was pregnant. He threw me on the bed when I asked to leave and I watched him break his door. I ran out and walked home five miles. We ended up having an abortion, mutually agreeing we were unfit parents. The next time we fought it was over the same thing, I wanted to leave him and he proceeded to throw my dresser down breaking it, two walls and my personal effects. After wards things calmed down or so I thought...he would start using suicidal threats as leverage to keep me around knowing I have a conscious.

We thought we needed to move in together to help our issues, it only made them worse. He would tell me no one would ever love me, I was this vulgar name or that horrendous insult. Until one day in the car he slapped me and I ran out of my own car on a not very busy highway. He kicked me to the ground and dragged me back to the car. Smashing my face in his hand if I tried to yell to by passers for help. It would go on and on. He would drag me, kick me, punch me, throw me and slap me over a period of six months. He even broke my nose one time from hitting me so hard.

He eventually began threatening to kill me and mixing alcohol into his rage engrossed fits. I’ve been thrown into every object possible, had a black eye or bruise on every inch of me. He told me I was the reason he was so angry and that I would stay with him forever and endure the abuse to pay the price. Until one day he beat me in our new apartment. I was in the shower and he lost his mind. He ended up punching me all over my back, thighs and legs. He slapped me so hard he cracked my nose AGAIN. He saw I had his my ID and debit card in my pants and began trying to suffocate and smother my face holding me down. I begged and screamed for him to stop until he did. I grabbed my puppy and ran to my neighbors and called 911. He was arrested and I was granted a protection order again him.

The sickest part was I didn't realize what he was doing was wrong because he had a sheet over my head. I felt like I was a nuisance calling the police until I saw six cop cars arrive and he was charged with four different things including kidnapping and domestic violence. That day I realized I was the victim and it's not ok.

K. Gracia