My story started 7 months ago when I met my now ex-boyfriend. We had been friends for years and knowing that I suffered from mental health problems and was on the road to recovery I just couldn’t resist when he told me he was head over heels in love with me as a person, who saw past all my flaws and scars and would do anything to help me no matter what.
The abuse started about a month into our relationship, I was too naive to realize at first. It started with him blaming me for little things like “making him angry” he used to drive 3 times the speed limit whilst I was in the car and I would get screamed at whenever I would peacefully protest to the obviously danger he was placing us both in.
Eventually the language he used became scary and threatening. He’d call me a stupid cunt, a slag, threaten suicide, slam doors and have fits at rage when things would go wrong that were out of my immediate control. Over time I became anxious and scared of his presence.
A prisoner in my own home, scared of the way his actions made me feel and doubtful of my own sanity when he used to constantly tell me I was just “too sensitive” I became a shell of myself constantly and if I even mentioned leaving him all hell would break loose. I thought of suicide often and truly believed I would never be able to escape this never ending nightmare that was my relationship.
The emotional and mental abuse he subjected me to had worn me down to almost nothing. I came clean to my family about what was happening when one night I had to call them because he was having an episode and I was absolutely terrified and I felt so alone. With the help of my family and friends I left the relationship and I am still to this day telling myself that it wasn’t my fault, that I’m not crazy and that he will never change the way he used to say he would after every angry fit; he would comfort me every time and apologize over and over again making a promise to change.
These people never change and they never will. They will hurt, scream, shout, manipulate and unhinge your mind until they have complete control all whilst simultaneously blaming your for their behavior.